Feeling meh...

我以为我已经可以放下他了。只从那一天看到他载着一个女生出去吃饭，感觉好难受，心好酸。我承认，我真的吃醋。那天的心情好糟糕。突然开始问自己为何他载的不是我。用了最现代化的帮发去疏解不愉快的心情。去唱K。。。那天，我和富太一起标了好多首歌。慢慢的就把这种感觉忘了。也许，唱歌是个很好的办法去疏解情绪。

一两个礼拜过了，没想到昨天会遇到他在路旁走着。我的心开始“泡泡”的跳，超高兴的。拥抱着一些小希望还有机会看到他。但如今天，我放工的时候，遇到他驾车载着Joyce. 好多疑问不停在我的脑海里出现。他们是男女朋友吗？几时开时？个个种种的问题。会是好朋友吗？

我真的好心痛。可以这么办呢？天啊，有没有医心痛的药吗？

Jealousy Week

My weekdays started with turbulences. I was not confirmed to be permanent staff,moving office with loads of documents, n etc. Well, pretty messy and annoying.

Thank God this week most of the issues is well managed. I wish to gratefully thank one of my colleague who wilfully did some "analysis" to resolve one of my problems. Yeah, she managed to convince me when she did spare some of her precious time in deep thoughts of the issues and looking for solutions instead. I shall remember that. What oldies says: “不见了橙，得到个吉。

老天真的对我不坏。

Last Friday, I saw D was out for lunch alone with another girl. A small size lady to accompany him for luncheon. Well, it feels so bad to see the person you actually interested hanging out alone with another girls (one of the sign of jealously). I had tried to peek the lady who was sitting beside him but no guts. Scare feel even more terrible after saw what I didn't wish too. After some thoughts and emo days, it can be concluded this way: i) he is a good guy who deserve better girl and perhaps that girl suits her more ii) Yup, i'm really jealous and still no further chemistry in between us iii) life still goes on no matter how happy or unhappy you are...

Well, it hurts but I know I can overcome it very soon. May God bless he get a good partner soonest possible. The same wish from me.

Clumsy day..

Hurmm...Last week was pretty memorable one. Lil guy, named D dated me out for movie. Too bad, my mum had appointment in the morning. Thought that my plan was perfectly planned, the day was almost ruined. Bring mum to hospital in the morning, BahKutTeh lunch and back for my movies plan. Sounds perfect.

Uh-oh....Thanks to my lil sister and dad who added some agenda in the plan without my knowledge (and of course I didn't tell them my night plan as well). My lil sister tested my patience on that day and unbelievable, we nearly fought. Haha...Because of D. At the end, I'm late for the movie.

My mind was fighting and all is about D. Cause I know this thing seldom happens and maybe only happens this, today, the only day.

Reaching the place, my clumsiness override everything. Talking to those who I thought I suppose to join them for the movie. It ends pretty awkward when am explaining my situation to those not suppose to involve. Haha...好白目。。。I need to salute myself when my clumsiness worsen the situation. Accidentally step on one of my friend's foot, drop my sling bag on the another's friend's thigh.....BLUSHHHH...What more I could say...

Sharin of 3 Lil Gentleman

Hmm...Today I want to share some thought on guys I have met. Recently only I realise that I have very low self-confidence on love issues. That's why until today, do not dare to made any moves. Or should I say that I prefer to wait guys to make their first move? Or guys nowadays prefer more aggressive gals? Perhaps...

I have been wondering for a long time for how a guy "signalling" a gal to show that he is really interested. Here, I have three samples which shows symptoms or not at all (or maybe perasan)...

Let's name first guy, T. Knew him for one year. My first impression towards him was not so good. A sarcastic speaking guy who get on my nerve sarcastically. Gradually, the impression gone when it was substitute with kindness. T is actually a very kind and gentleman. The only guy whom I seriously considering his invitation. Yes, we went out for a day trip and it ends awkward. But, it shows he is more gentleman. Keeping entertaining in case I got bored. Any girls which good boyfriend who is fulfilling to endless destination, he is the one. When working, could sense, feel or see at the corner of the eyes that someone is actually observing you. Am not sure whether is for good or other way round. During my birthday celebration, he sang Birthday song in Korean. Word to describe: Kind, Creative, Gentlemen.

Second guy, will named him S. This shy guy is actually quite an introvert. He will not share more or close to you unless somebody make the first move. Well, I don't really know how this chemistry happened. The rumors get us closer eventually. Due to the rumors, he dated me out for lunch even often and even chatted more during office hours. A very cute guy who started to learn to joke. Teach me to be patient and emotional control. A very nice guy who never kills any living being. Somehow, whenever I need help, he will be the first one to volunteer himself. Eg, need somebody to fetch me to service centre to pick up my car. He did that although need to OT. Word to describe: Kind, Lovely, Soft-hearted.

Third guy, is the guy that fulfil most requirements, named him D. If looking for perfect boyfriend, he will certainly be in list. Yes, cannot resist his sweet and adorable smile. Shy and sweet guy with booming career. I knew his existence but never remembers his name. Too bad, huh. I never expected that the guy drove me to concert will be him. A huge surprise. Eventually, the concert brings us closer. Through the concert only I knew he is the guy with guitar. Love it! A memorable one.

Well, just a little sharing that this three people made some prints. Of course I know it doesn't mean anything cause am hasty type that will lead to no good ends..

Blue blue Sky..

Oh, Valentine is coming. A very special day yet nobody beside me. Supposedly today is a special day, yet it turns out to be not what I thought of.

I have been wondering that is there something wrong with my sixth sense? I knew this guy for some time. One word to fully describe him "kind" ness. That's the main attractiveness that I did not see in other guys. I guess, he didn't know that this is his main strengths.

For the first time when I saw him, his sarcastic-ness really pissed me off. Swear that during that time I need to keep this guy away. Certainly not my cup of tea. Well, human is weird, and I need to keep back my words. I saw his heart which was beautifully made and I do not know how to describe it.

Yes, he attracted me and my sixth sense is telling me that this guy left some space for me. But, am I thinking too much?

Is it that hard to find a guy who can touched the bottom of my with with joy, laughter and tears? The person who can see what type of "card" I am playing, who is ever brave enough?

不快乐的之中的快乐

我一直都相信 “苦中带甜” 的道理。今天总算给我遇到了。可是我的是 “不快乐中带点甜”。原来，好人是那么难当的。那天，发出内心要帮满好友却得到 “FFK" 的下场， 要求他人帮忙也没了。破坏我的计划。。。。

心情糟糕的我带着不愉快的心情去上班。同时，我的“阿头” 带了一瓶大城市最出名的糖果。看到了它，什么气都消了。多姿多彩又多口味的糖果真的让人舍不得把它吃了。

原来简单的糖果跟他人一起分享也是一种小小的快乐。可惜，我有一位臭嘴的同事不懂得珍惜。原谅他吧！

今天我体会到生活有可能有很多不完美的地方，千万别气馁。应为过程当中会有一线光照着我们，带出许多欢喜更快乐。。加油吧！！

Arghh

My life as a student finally ended. It is the time for me to move into new stage of my life. Although this New Year I didn't have time to enjoy much because of assignment's datelines, I felt quite contented because I have fully completed the course. Hopefully I can pull through my final semester.

I feel so pathetic and started to doubt the definition of "f.r.i.e.n.d.s" in my dictionary when my sister's incident took place. She has less friends but those few close friends are so close until they shared the joy and laughter during that precious week holiday. Those are things I could see when they took turns to each others houses sharing all kinds of activities, 38 news, cards, movies and etc.

Then I compared with what I got this year. I dated my friends to go out and the outcomes of course I do not wish to explain. I always knew family is important but numerous occasion took place. Is it something wrong with my interest, topic and bla bla bla which made them feel rejected or boring or I really didn't even worth a penny to share about. OMG....Yes, I'm here to ask 1001 question and to relieve dissatisfaction. Coz I know she wont read about this. Really got fed up and boring when I heard friends asking me to go out 'padahal' I'm not in locally but when I was home, "kentut" pun tak rak....

It seems like my close friends are not even close to me at all. With their numerous excuses and "lap" me aside really made me annoyed. Pretty annoyed caused this incident did not happen for first time and willno be last time as well.