After the last day of working day, he came for once; the only one time. That's the last time I saw him until today. Hardly to admit, yes, miss him quite a lot. I never knew moving house is a terribly tiring job. Until, this is the first time where I have to pack all my goods for moving to two houses. What to do, the room readily available here is like a small "chicken cage" or more like a store room for people to keep their things rather than for me to use as rooms for sleeping.
Two days ago when I moved home, I can see that my car was too or overly packed with things to bring home. So sorry to "tengking" my mum that day as it is really hectic. Thank God my sis corrected me on the spot and I shall remember this attitude all the time as a lesson not to be rude to her again.
Only then I realised that it had been a long time I didn't feel family warmth again. Family means that everyone have to present and live together and no one shall be missed. When I'm at home, visiting my uncle (the only uncle that pampered me the most), grandma and other relatives, the sense of warmth can be felt when everyone joke jovially while eating mangos teen. That time, no matter how tired you are, truthfully you will stay awake to join the crowd of warmth.
Staying in city for years, I realise the my "kindness" and "generosity" gradually escape from me. When I see my grandma, I felt very guilty for unable to look after her as well as my mum. How many years more can they live? I asked myself. I'm not filial at all. What can I do?
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